In early centuries, animals lived peacefully together in giant forests across the world. Fish had legs that allowed them to walk on land and all animals had the ability to speak to one another. This story is based on a unique friendship between a leopard and a fish.
Fred the fish was best friends with Linnie the leopard. They spent all of their time together, every day. The two were inseparable. Both Fred and Linnie had wives and two children. The families loved each other and grew up together.
Fred the fish was best friends with Linnie the leopard. They spent all of their time together, every day. The two were inseparable. Both Fred and Linnie had wives and two children. The families loved each other and grew up together.
A walking fish.
Photo Cred: Louis Dietvorst
Linnie the leopard was a recognized hunter among the animals in the forest. He is known to have the ability to kill any predator that entered the forest. Other animals hired Linnie as a bounty killer to find and kill animals who had broken the laws of the forest. Linnie ended his career as a bounty hunter when he married his wife and decided to settle down and teach young animals fighting skills for self-protection.
Fred the fish on the other hand was a schoolteacher. Quite smart, Fred taught algebra to various fish and forest animals. He was known for his intelligence and care for his students.
The two grew close as friends at an early age. Fred would always help Linnie out in school and Linnie would protect Fred from any bullies.
One day, Linnie asked Fred to help him with some finances. Because Linnie’s skill was finding and killing, he needed some help when it came to his finances for his family and creating a retirement plan. Fred agreed with an agreement that Linnie would teach his son how to defend himself at school and learn self-protection.
For one week, Linnie would take Fred’s son to learn how to fight, while Fred took care of figuring out and managing Linnie’s finances. When the week was over, Fred had told Linnie that he had figured out Linnie’s finances and a retirement plan that would assure him to have enough money to support his family for the remainder of his life.
Thrilled by Fred’s work, Linnie threw Fred a huge party and invited the entire forest to attend. The animals ate, drank and danced the night away in honor of Fred’s good friendship. The next morning, Linnie woke up to Albert, a ram who was a tax collector. Albert declared Linnie's bank account as bankrupt.
“How could this be?” asked Linnie, “Fred took care of all my finances just yesterday!”
Linnie looked for Fred, but he was nowhere to be found. He searched the entire forest and asked every animal, but no one had seen Fred. Then, one of Linnie’s neighbors told him that she had seen Fred take a suitcase of money from Linnie’s home during the party. Linnie was astonished and could not believe his best friend would do such a thing after all there years of friendship.
Angered, Linnie went to his old friend the lion, the king of the forest, to tell him the situation. The king sent his servants to search the entire forest and find Fred and bring him back to his palace. The servants found Fred on the outskirts of the forest trying to purchase a giant house tree worth millions of forest dollars. The servants quickly got ahold of him and the suitcase full of money and brought Fred to the king. When the king lion proved Fred was guilty of this evil crime, he swore to the forest that because of Fred’s betrayal to his best friend, that no fish would never be able to walk or breathe on land again and could only swim in the sea. To this day, fish remain in the water due to Fred’s betrayal of his best friend.
AUTHOR'S NOTE: This story is based from the Nigerian folktale, The Fish and the Leopard's Wife. In this story, the fish and the leopard are best friends until the leopard discovers that the fish is having an affair with his wife. I thought the story was very original and unique so I wanted to take a spin that had similar guidelines. I was pretty surprised about the outcome when I read this original story, but it was so interesting that I enjoyed it. I wanted my story to be similar, but give more background information in to the lives and relationships of the character as well as think of a new way of betrayal. I really don't like stories where affairs occur, so I wanted the trial to be over something that people can relate to, but not as tragic.
I liked how the leopard and fish are friends in the original story, so I wanted to keep the same animals as friends, but give them some more personality. I wanted to bring their families more into the picture to give more of an emotional draw to each of the characters. This was a fun unit to read and I enjoyed getting to write a story based from these myths. I hope you enjoy the characters in this story and can see their personality. It was a fun story to write!
I liked how the leopard and fish are friends in the original story, so I wanted to keep the same animals as friends, but give them some more personality. I wanted to bring their families more into the picture to give more of an emotional draw to each of the characters. This was a fun unit to read and I enjoyed getting to write a story based from these myths. I hope you enjoy the characters in this story and can see their personality. It was a fun story to write!
BIBLIOGRAPHY:
Title: Folk Stories From Southern Nigeria
Author: Elphinstone Dayrel
Year: 1910
Title: Folk Stories From Southern Nigeria
Author: Elphinstone Dayrel
Year: 1910
Hey Landon,
ReplyDeleteI liked you story a lot! I read the Nigerian folktales too and this was one of the ones I focused on. I enjoyed the backstory for the fish and leopard, I thought it helped develop the story a little more into more than just an explanation for why fish live only in the sea. You might go back through and check some spelling stuff - there were some words that were spelled correctly but weren't the right word you were looking so I'll bet spell check missed it.
I really enjoyed your story, Landon. It was simple, easy to read, and it flowed really well to a good conclusion! I hadn't seen any stories thus far that explained why fish were only allowed in the water, so it was nice to see how the Nigerian people explained it. I like how you changed the story to make the fish steal the leopard's money, instead of having an affair with his wife. It makes a lot more sense your way!
ReplyDeleteWhat a cool story. While they are always so odd and unrealistic, I do have a fascination with these "how things came to be…" stories. I must admit, I was a little confused about the story at first. But it was very interesting and well-written. I kind of pictured the fish as Jonah Hill and the leopard as Channing Tatum (like 21 Jump Street). Also, just picturing Jonah Hill as a walking fish is hilarious. But I digress.
ReplyDeleteAnyways, I was shocked when Jonah Hill stole from Channing Tatum after Channing Tatum threw him a party. This led well to the ending of the fish getting caught, and the punishment of every fish.
From reading your author's note, it seems to me like your story is even better than the original. The whole affair thing seems way more serious. Your version seems much more like a kids appropriate folk story.
Hey Landon! I never read the original story but I really like your unique version of it. Understanding the characters more in detail is always something I look for in a story so I make a better connection to the characters. I thought it was interesting to read a folk tale on the reason why fish can’t swim. The story was super interesting and really enjoyed the interesting story. I really like stories that are filled with animal characters that have human characteristics. But while I was reading I did notice a few errors I thought could use correcting. In the third paragraph, you said, “we was known” but I think you should say “he was known.” Also, there are some paragraphs that should be put together. It seems like you have a lot of smaller paragraphs that could be combined together. Other than those revisions, I think the story was very good and I really enjoyed the read. Can not wait to read more stories in the future!
ReplyDeleteHello, Landon! First off, I love the image that you used for this story, haha. It’s just so. . . unique, and very evocative of the characters and the setting you portray. Secondly, the image of a leopard as a bounty killer—not just a hunter, but a killer—is easily imagined and yet an intriguing idea. And for a leopard bounty killer and a fish schoolteacher to be friends is an intriguing scenario, as well. Plus, I never would’ve guessed that the schoolteacher fish would be the one to betray the bounty killer leopard—an interesting twist, and definitely a huge surprise.
ReplyDeleteYour story was very engaging, the characters and plot well-developed, and there was definitely a bit of that “emotional draw” that you were going for. I think your change from the fish cheating with the leopard’s wife to stealing the leopard’s money was well-done, and I just wonder why you think (in either story) the fish decided to betray his childhood friend.
Great work, and I cannot wait to read more of your portfolio stories!
Landon,
ReplyDeleteAwesome story man! You kept my attention the whole time. I loved how detailed you went into on their background as friends. I never would have expected that ending to happen. The way to build their friendship made them seem like almost brothers. I especially wouldn’t of suspected fish of foul play, since his reputation was about caring for others. I thought the story was going to end with leopard being hired to kill fish. I also liked how you kept the lion the king of the forest. Lions always are the kings thanks to Disney. I thought the story itself gave a cool spin on how we have land and water creatures as well.
Your author’s note was good too. I really appreciated how you explain the original story, and your intention to keep the similarities between both stories. I also like your spin better. Money is the more realistic reason to split friendships. After all, money is the root of evil.
The only mistake you made was using we instead of he is paragraph 3.
Landon. I thought that this was a great story. You gave great detail throughout the entire story, which made me want to keep reading. I also thought you have a great writing style and did an excellent job with the overall flow of the story. It was interesting that the fish ended up betraying the leopard because I originally thought that it might be the other way around.
ReplyDeleteI liked that you kept the theme of the story about betrayal and split friendships. It was great that you explained this within your author's note. It was interesting that you changed the betrayal about money, because that could actually happen in real life. I liked that you kept true to the original and made the story an explanation why fish live in water. Great job with this story and it is a good addition to your storybook!